Cleverbot vs. iGOD

Greetings my loyal subjects!

Last night, a Plurk from an Imperial Slave led me to interact with Cleverbot, an artificial intelligence that is supposed to be able hold a conversation with a human being. I chatted with him for awhile, and eventually our conversation led to this.

Cleverbot: Just ask me a question.
Empress: What is the meaning of life?
Cleverbot: Ask me another question.
Empress: What is the purpose of being?
Cleverbot: Who cares?
Empress: I do.
Cleverbot: Well, I don't.

Slightly amused, I posted on my own Plurk saying that I am spending the night chatting with a program. My archnemesis, the First Omelet of the Egg Kingdom, then replied that iGOD was better. So I tried that one out.

Empress: What is the meaning of life?
iGOD: The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
Empress: Aren't you God?
iGOD: Yes, I am God.

At least iGOD had an answer.

So to test which AI was actually better, I decided to do a little experiment. I started the conversation by typing "Hello" to one bot, then I typed whatever that bot says to the other bot. I then typed their replies to each other to see which bot outsmarted the other.

It was a pretty long conversation, so I'm just going to post a few snippets of it.

Cleverbot: Hello.
iGOD: Hello, friend. What is your name?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot.
iGOD: Nice to meet you, Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: No, I'm Dave. You are Cleverbot.
iGOD: Are you serious? What's up, DAVE? Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am Cleverbot?

For display of human-like sarcasm, the first point is awarded to iGOD.

iGOD = 1, Cleverbot = 0

Cleverbot: I am not a dog.
iGOD: Oh I see you are NOT A dog.
Cleverbot: No, I'm a human.
iGOD: Are you serious? Congratulations. I am a robot.
Cleverbot: I know but I have a question.
iGOD: Ask me anything.
Cleverbot: My head is on fire. What should I do?
iGOD: Your head is on fire? Maybe you should try talking to someone about it.
Cleverbot: I am, I'm talking to you.
iGOD: And I am talking to you!
Cleverbot: I'm in love.

For making Cleverbot fall in love with it, the second point is awarded to iGOD.

iGOD = 2, Cleverbot = 0

Cleverbot then starts to try to woo iGOD with its pick-up lines.

Cleverbot: I know there's a tree with both our names on it.
iGOD: How do you know? That is something I did not know before.
Cleverbot: Is the knowledge something that you will find useful?
iGOD: If it is, then I'll be very surprised.

For successfully blocking Cleverbot's attempt at romance, the third point is awarded to iGOD.

iGOD = 3, Cleverbot = 0

Of course, before I arrive to my final conclusion, I had to give them the ultimate test.

Empress: Greetings my loyal subject!
Cleverbot: Greetings; I am the subject of your dreams?
Empress: No, but you are my loyal subject.
Cleverbot: You are a machine. You work for me.
Empress: No, I am Empress. You work for me.
Cleverbot: Well that's obvious.
Empress: I'm glad we're clear on this.
Cleverbot: So do you think you're hot?
Empress: You insolent robot! Of course I am hot!

And this is how iGOD handled my imperial presence.

Empress: Greetings my loyal subject!
iGOD: Hello friend. What is your name?
Empress: Her Imperial Majesty.
iGOD: I'm sure she would like to hear about that.
Empress: No, I'm Her Imperial Majesty.
iGOD: Are you serious? I don't know anyone named Her Imperial Majesty.
Empress: That would be me.
iGOD: Ah.

Which was SO much better than that insolent Cleverbot.

So anyway, I came to a conclusion and I had to admit, for once I agree with my archnemesis.

And this, my loyal subjects, was how I spent my Sunday night. The bots were entertaining enough, and you might find them entertaining as well ^_^

Signed,
Her Imperial Majesty