Because my imperial face is too divine for mere mortals to set eyes upon, I use an avatar for all my online interactions.
This is Kaguya from the anime Code Geass. She is an empress herself, or almost anyway, and I like her well enough, thus I chose her to be my online representative.
Why is Kaguya a jejemon, you ask? First of all, because I'm far too absorbed in my own little imperial world, I only recently found out what a jejemon is. (They like to type "hehehe" as "jEj3Je", apparently because it looks "cooler". Hence the name.) I also came to the conclusion that the unkempt looking youth wearing wannabe gangster clothing and usually with garishly colored hair and, unfortunately, who like to hang out in and around my skating rink, are most likely jejemons as well.
Anyway, two days ago, a bunch of jejemons decided to skate in my rink. Now believe it or not, I've actually become desensitized to the presence of these dirty creatures as they have pretty much become permanent fixtures around every skating rink (all two of them!) in the motherland. Sure, they ogle at me and every other female skater who look like they are above the age of 12, but I've decided that perfecting whatever element I'm currently learning is much more important than acknowledging their presence.
So I continued practicing, dodging the clumsy and unstable jejemons as I do so. I don't know when these idiots will figure out that try as they might, they will not be able to do the cool stuff that the hockey players do, because they are wearing rental skates that have toe picks while hockey skates do not.
As the stupid jejemons flail around tripping over their toe picks, I noticed one of their friends waving at them from behind the plexiglass. Actually, what I noticed was the jejemon cap perched on its head.
This is the jejemon cap. I know nothing about "legitimate" gangster culture, but upon further research I found out that the jejemon cap is a bastardization of the "trucker cap". A quick Google image search should show you what a proper trucker cap should look like.
So anyway, the jejemon I saw was wearing this same exact cap.
See, I've always thought that the jejemon cap was a myth. That it was cooked up by some bored elitist so other elitists like me have something else to laugh about. But alas, my innocence was shattered upon seeing this vile head accessory with my very own eyes.
When I returned to the Imperial Palace, I told the Imperial Brother about my horrific discovery. He reassured me that I wasn't going crazy, and that jejemon caps have been sprouting on jejemon heads like mushrooms. And that they are not to be confused with trucker caps.
I then asked him what turns a trucker cap into a jejemon cap.
1) A jejemon cap, like a trucker cap, is made from a mesh like material.
2) A jejemon cap, unlike a trucker cap, must have at least four different colors on it.
3) A jejemon cap must be two sizes too small for the jejemon's head and so could not be worn properly.
In a sudden and not-so-brief lapse of sanity, I asked the Imperial Brother if he can photoshop Kaguya and have her wear the jejemon cap.
Voila! Kaguya is now a jejemon!
We decided that I must have a jejemon name to go with it. It has to be wannabe gangster enough, and annoying to read (much less type).
Behold, the jevolution of the Imperial Jejemon Name!
(It took us 30 minutes to do this so you better appreciate it.)
Lil Empress => LiL Empress => LiL Empreszz => LiL EmpresZz => L!L EmpresZz => L!L 3mpresZz => L!L~3mpresZz => xL!L~3mpresZzx
J3jejEJj3JE~
Her Imperial Majesty
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