An Imperial Birthday Cake

Greetings my loyal subjects!

When I first returned from exile, some of my friends cajoled me into treating them to dinner. Of course, I know well enough that this group of friends are always on the lookout for a free meal. (After all, I'd do the same to them). Being the kind, loving, and generous friend that I am, I obliged.

So last night, my gay friend offered to meet me at the mall and drive me to the restaurant where we will meet our other friends. Because he is gay, he refused to pick me up from the imperial palace instead. (I am not referring to the Head Imperial Priestess, by the way. I have other gay friends you know.) Anyway, because of this, I have had to suffer the indignity of having to ride the commoners' jeepney.

Riding the jeepney was, of course, an unpleasant experience. Not only did I have to endure all that dirt and pollution, but the jeepney's route took me right past a stinky, smelly commoner's wet market. I silently cursed my gay friend for being too gay to drive all the way to the imperial palace.

So we arrived at the restaurant where we met up with our other friends, who of course pretended to have missed me. We briefly updated each other on what's going on in our lives until it was time to order food. My gay friend, because he is gay, ordered the most expensive food item on the menu.

Then there was the matter of my other friend, who kept swiping my french fries because her fajitas weren't ready yet. By the time they were served to her, she was too full to eat.

Yet even though two more of my friends ordered burgers and were only able to eat half of them, so they could have just ordered one and split it, it was a happy, delicious, albeit needlessly expensive meal. The conversation was great, we reminded each other of all the crazy things we have done in the past. Perhaps someday I will regale you, my loyal subjects, with these tales.

For now, I leave you with an image of the imperial birthday cake we had for dessert.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Molten Cake @ Chili's

(Excuse the quality, this picture was taken using a commoner's phone camera.)

Signed,

Her Imperial Majesty